New Voices

New Revelations in Gibson Frame-up

“I was just having a fun night out on the town. Sure, I’d had a drink or two, but nothing an Aussie like me can’t handle. But someone put something in my drink, and everything after that goes black. I woke up the next day, confused and arrested. This has been a tough time for me.”

The actor, who is perhaps most widely known for his portrayal of the wisecracking aviating rooster Rocky in 2000’s Chicken Run, has been working with the Malibu sheriff’s department to uncover the identity of his assailant.

“I don’t remember much, I was at the nightclub [Moonshadows], and I saw someone at the punch bowl. I didn’t think anything of it at the time, but when I think back to it there was something suspicious about him. I couldn’t put my finger on it exactly, but I got a decent look. I still wake up some nights with his image in my mind...”

Mr. Gibson has worked with LAPD artists to generate what he says is an accurate composite sketch of the man he saw at the nightclub. The image, which was released today by the Sheriff’s department, was accompanied by a warning earlier this afternoon is below. If you see someone matching the description, please contact the sheriff’s dept. Do not attempt to confront him, the suspect is considered armed and pious. “We’re worried,” said a spokesman for the department. “We do not believe this person was working alone. If this could happen to someone as visible and popular as Mr. Gibson, then the general populace is almost certainly at risk."

“Sure, he looked like he was just dancing and drinking and having a night out on the town like everyone else,” said Mr. Gibson, “but I know better. I don’t know who did this awful thing to me, but by god [Jesus], I won’t stop until we find them and rectify this injustice.”

posted by Shlomocles @ 8:13 AM